be AUDacious

What I've Been Reading: October

ONE DAY: 2 stars
I really wish I had more positive things to say about this novel. I think the premise is really interesting and full of potential. This reminds me a lot of Nick Hornby, but it wasn't able to sustain my interest like most of Hornby's work does. In fact, I found much of this to be pretty monotonous, with the same characters in the same kinds of situations over and over. I liked Emma's character to an extent, but Dexter was just completely unlikeable -- and I wanted to dislike Emma because she liked Dexter, if that makes any sense. I really didn't like a number of the choices that the author made when it came to the characters, and I think that's really what bothered me the most about this book. At times, you could see events unfolding because of a character's actions and choices -- things that were driven by who the character WAS; but at other times you could really see the author's hand controlling what happened, and that's where I was most irritated at the lack of character development and change. It's really too bad that the hopeful tone that permeates the very last chapter (which I think might have been one of the best chapters, to be honest) couldn't be sustained and developed throughout the rest of the book.

ALICE I HAVE BEEN: 3 stars
I had my copy autographed by Melanie Benjamin at last year's Southern Festival of Books, and she signed it "May we be happy." Appropriate, as this is really the underlying theme of her novel, a fictional account of the real Alice in Wonderland. I really felt uneasy during much of my reading of this book; it was hard to know if Dodgeson's relationship with Alice was innocent or not. That's been debated time and again, but there's never been any proof. I don't think I really buy the whole "suppressed memories" angle that Benjamin seems to use here, either. It's been a long time since I've read Alice in Wonderland, but it seems to me that Alice's story was never "her" story; rather, it was Dodgeson's story, his wish to have Alice never grow up. I think Benjamin's take, and Alice's wish to just be happy, is perhaps more accurate. In any case, it's rendered well here, but there's something about the story that just failed to really capture my heart and mind.

BOSSYPANTS: 3 stars
I really admire Tina Fey; I appreciate her intelligence and way of making an important point with humor. I thought the writing for Mean Girls was fantastic, and I think she's an excellent voice for young females -- I've said before that I really wish she'd write a young adult novel. I thought this was kind of funny, but it fell flat in a number of places. The format bothered me -- there were too many little weird chapters tucked into the narrative. (I've never seen 30 Rock either, so all of that material was just basically lost on me). I think this is an instance where the material would've been much better suited for medium of TV, rather than the written word. 

THIS DARK ENDEAVOR: 3 stars
As a young adult take on the fictional character of Victor Frankenstein, this was a little more plot-driven and a little less character-driven than I normally prefer, although Oppel does make an attempt to get inside Frankenstein's head. The overall mood is fairly suspenseful with a Gothic moodiness, and there are several great action scenes, although the writing gets a bit choppy at times. My issue with the novel is that Victor's actionas and character are already so firmly established (in the original novel), which felt limiting to me -- I already knew what was going to happen and why, so I didn't feel like I was really discovering his character as I read, which is disappointing.

**The setting kept reminding me of The Stress of Her Regard by Tim Powers, which is a fantastic novel; you should definitely check it out if you like Romanticism, Lord Byron, vampires, and alternative histories. Sounds like a crazy mix, but Powers is immensely talented and pulls it off with ease. 

THE PAINTED BOY: 4 stars
I can't tell you how glad I am to be back in familiar Charles de Lint territory. This novel is so much better than his typical YA books, maybe because he's back to just writing, rather than focusing on a specific audience. This reminds me a bit of Someplace to be Flying, and it's not as heavyhanded as some of his novels can get when it comes to "issues." He really focuses on the spirit of a place in this novel, and that seems to reflect his own personal growing love for the desert -- we've moved quite far from the forests of Newford). The ending was a little too pat, but that's nothing to really complain about. The characters are well-drawn; I love the attention that de Lint gives to all of his characters, even the most minor (I loved Lupita...I'm hoping she'll continue to show up in future books). de Lint was my first introduction to "urban fantasy," and I'm happy to add another novel to my collection of his books that I feel is a really strong addition, rather than just so-so.

DRAWING DOWN THE MOON: 4 stars
I received a digital ARC of this book from the publisher via Netgalley. This is a book that you definitely want to get in print, rather than as an e-book. Vess's artwork is wonderfully detailed and intricate, and you just can't see all the details on a digital copy. This large collection features plates from a variety of projects with notes from Vess on the genesis of the piece, his working relationship with the author, project specs and more. It's really interesting to get this insider look into the act of creating some amazing illustrations. The best part about the book is the walkthrough he provides on a large illustration, from the initial conception of the piece through multiple versions, showing his process. I think emerging artists and longtime fans both will appreciate what's here, and Susannah Clarke's introduction puts into words the specific magic that is an illustration by Charles Vess. Nobody does Shakespeare like he does (his Puck is THE best), and his Green Apple Man from Charles de Lint's stories is one of my favorite characters. While I wholeheartedly recommend this collection, personally I'd rather have the individual books (I've got quite the collection already). 

...light a candle's end, you are a light turned low...

1. I love how the evenings finally begin to slow down in the fall, so that we can come home as it darkens outside and curl up with a good book for a bit before starting supper.

2. sky on fire

3. Work trips to Russellville involve driving past the Jefferson Davis monument each way; I can see it for miles in each direction because it's basically out in the middle of Amish farmland.

4. Once I start designing, it's hard to strike a balance between designing and scrapping. It seems to be an all-or-nothing thing for me.

5. Today concludes National Gear Up week. If you have a chance to talk to a teen about college, do it. Mentors exist in the most unlikely of places.

6. Cami was so happy to pull out the Halloween decorations, though she bemoaned our lack of spiderwebs.

7. This is my favorite time of year.

8. PJ20: amazing to think that they've been providing a soundtrack for my life since I was 16.

9. Batgirl

10. Vampire Queen

new release: Heart & Home

This has been a really busy week -- lots of travel for work (with lots of work behind the scenes). That ends up equaling much less time for blogging, but I should be back on schedule next week. In the meantime, here are my new items for the shop this week. Remember, new releases are always 30% on release day.

collection  |  kit  |  painted papers  |  plaids & solids  |  elements  |  tags

Here are a couple of inspiration layouts from members of our DHD Decorator team.

by Anna

by Christy

WINNERS!

Thanks to those of you who got the word out about our weekend retirement sale at DHD.

Michelle Huegel, Yanina, Danica, and Anna -- email me at audneal at gmail dot com with the name of the kit you'd like to receive (Flight Path, Modern Fall, or Small Talk) and I'll get the codes to you as soon as I can.

book review: Saving June

Reading is such a personal, subjective issue -- and writing reviews of books that you've read is even more so. I've always tried to be somewhat consistent in how I review books (both here and on Goodreads), but I know I'm not always successful at that. Sometimes, what turns me off about one book is what jumps out and really grabs my attention in another. I do my best to let go of expectations; I also do my best to strike a balance between critical reading and "comfortable" reading (reading just for the joy of reading). 

All of these things have been sitting in my head since I finished Saving June by Hannah Harrington. I saw it advertised on Netgalley, and when I checked it out on Goodreads, I saw that it was getting rave reviews. So I decided to give it a shot, even though it was published by Harlequin's teen imprint. I've got nothing against Harlequin, mind you; it's just that I know from experience that their books aren't a good fit for my reading tastes. Of course, these prior reading experiences led me to form some assumptions about this novel, assumptions that were supported by the jacket blurb.

And to be honest, those assumptions turned out to be somewhat true. The book does rely pretty heavily on some typical character types: the perfect older sister, the rebellious younger sister, the hot mysterious loner, the glamorous best friend with the disconnected parents. What I didn't expect was to connect so personally with this novel -- a connection that was strong enough that I didn't mind the cliches when they happened because there was enough good stuff to keep me reading. 

While the song is never mentioned in the novel, the plot could be summed up pretty easily by listening to "A Lifetime" by Better than Ezra; the situation is quite similar, although you'd need to change a few details. Music is a key player in this novel, almost becoming another character, and the mixtapes at the end are a great touch. 

What kept me engaged and kept me reading past the stereotypes, though, was the emotion; I'd be reading along and suddenly a sentence or a paragraph would just hit me right in the gut. The emotion behind Harper's grief felt authentic, even if the plotting or the characterization or the writing could've been more subtle or nuanced. I was willing to overlook those things because I could feel myself connecting despite those issues. There's a rawness and a vulnerability that comes through. And even though it's been a while since I've been a teenager, this book just reminded me of what it felt like to be that age, trying to figure things out and dealing with death, grief, love, loss, and so many other things for the first time. 

I liked the relationship that develops between Harper and Jake; I think Harrington was a little heavy-handed with Harper's frustration with him, but again, I could deal with it. There's definitely swoon here, and while the sex scene kinda made me cringe a little bit (just because I have a hard time reading most sex scenes without laughing -- because I'm totally immature like that, *and* because I think that's got to be the hardest thing to write without sounding so lame), again I thought that the emotion behind it felt real. 

From a critical standpoint, there's a lot to nitpick here. Like I said, Harrington relies pretty heavily on the "standards," but she's got a good ear; the dialogue works nicely and the story moves along at a good pace. There's a little too much reliance on telling instead of showing, and some character issues get wrapped up too quickly/cleanly/offstage for me to be completely happy with them. There are also a number of details that I thought needed cleaning up. For example, they arrive in San Francisco in June and Laney asks if there is AC in the apartment; she's told yes, and she goes running inside. Later, she eats popsicles to deal with the heat. Anyone who's been to San Francisco in June knows that heat is not an issue -- you'd be lucky to see a day with temps over 75. (Note: my copy was an advanced reader's copy, so it's very possible these details were corrected before the final printing.)

In the end, I'm stuck doing math, trying to figure out what kind of rating best captures all these disparate opinions. Technically, it's a 2.5-3.0 book; emotionally, it's a 5.0, Stylistically, it's awfully heavy on stereotype but generates enough interest in the details to earn a 3.5-4.0, which is where I've finally settled in terms of the whole reading experience. In the end, I let my heart lead the way, and that's where I found this novel's strong point.
(I was provided with a digital ARC of this novel from the publisher via Netgalley). 

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IF YOU LIKE SAVING JUNE, YOU'LL LOVE JELLICOE ROAD
When it comes to writing novels with an emotional whallop that will make you lose your breath, there's no one who does it better than Australian author Melina Marchetta. This woman is a powerhouse; you need to go out and read Jellicoe Road, Saving Francesca, The Piper's Son, and Looking for Alibrandi right now (those last two are on my to-read list). Seriously. You won't regret it, I promise. 

And then, for further proof of her insane talent, read Finnikan of the Rock. It's YA fantasy, which you'd think would be a huge departure from what she's done...except it's not. This review explains it far better than I can (and I've tried, really). Then grab a copy of Froi of the Exiles as soon as it's released.

SALE: get 'em while you can!

Design House Digital is having a retirement sale this weekend; a couple of designers are retiring their entire shops to make room for new designers, and others have chosen to just get rid of some older products. That's what I'm doing; the 15 kits you see below are on sale for this weekend only, and once the weekend's over, they'll be permanently retired so make sure you grab 'em now!

 

Want a chance to win one of my newest kits? All you have to do is help me advertise this weekend's sale; tweet about it, post it in your Facebook status, or blog about it. Then come back here and link me up to your tweet, status update, or blog post (or better yet, ALL three!) for a chance to win. I'll draw a random winner on Monday, and you'll get your choice of Modern Fall, Small Talk, or Flight Path free!

...it's hard to leave all these moments behind...

1. I was impressed with the wide range of selections they had in their YA section -- SO many great books, including all the National Book Award finalists, tagged with a small paper symbol like this. (This is my not-so-secret favorite -- more on this Monday).

2. I love historic downtown areas and old buildings. 

3. Local food, great atmosphere, plenty of time to just hang out and people-watch -- one of the upsides to traveling for work.

4. My favorite color blue is the color you get when you take an October day, full sunlight, and just a few puffy white clouds and mix them all together in a swirl of falling leaves.

5. It really is worth a 40-minute detour.

6. While she did her homework, big sis hung out in the chair next to her, looking through her bookshelves. How many 14-year-olds will willingly hang out with a 9-year-old little sister? The relationship they share is remarkable.

7. Rain. It lured me home at lunchtime and kept me there.

8. She wanted to play more games, even though they played four over the course of the weekend.

9. All Pearl Jam, all the time? Yes please.

10. Landscapes like this are poetry for the soul. Here's one I've always loved:

The Journey

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice--

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do--

determined to save

the only life you could save.

new release: Boo Bits & Blocks

Even though I haven't scrapped a paper layout in YEARS, I still love the look of paper scrapbook products, and I often try to mimic that look with the digital products and layouts I create. That's what I was going for with these simple releases: Boo Blocks and Boo Bits. Simple tone-on-tone patterns and a patchwork approach, held together with messy machine stitching. Tags in a variety of sizes, with spookily cute paper-pieced images and a fresh Halloween color palette. Add a pinned set of photo frames to highlight your cutest costumes, and your pages will come together in a snap.

Here's a layout by Lizj, one of the newest Decorators at the House:

and here's one by Decorator Mandib:

wayback Wednesday: grandparents

Most of our photos of the girls when they were little have been scrapbooked, although there is still one box of photos that I haven't gotten to; all of this was before the advent of owning a digital camera (meaning=we won't discuss the number of digital files that HAVEN'T been scrapped). Chris pulled this box down from the closet shelf a couple of nights ago and started looking through it. In addition, there's one other box of photos there, mostly photos from my childhood that Mom has given to me. This one caught my eye for a number of reasons.

• That's me (on the right) and my little sister. Don't you love our expressions? I'm pretty sure those are fairly typical representations of our personalities. 
• Elisha and I are 27 months apart in age. Mom used to dress us alike when we were little, and I don't think that we minded. In fact, I think we probably liked it. Sometimes our outfits were identical; at other times, we would have the same shirt or the same dress, except in different colors. In fact, that was pretty common. I know the shirts we had on were velveteen with the ribbon accents across the front and a banded hem. I *think* they were storebought (maybe Garanimals?) but I'm not sure; Mom used to sew a lot of our clothes, so she very well could have made these shirts for us.
• The dog belonged to my Granny and Gramps (that's my mom's maternal grandparents). I don't remember his name at all; I actually remember very little about him, except that after he died, my Granny had a model made of him out of ceramic. (She also had another one of their cat, and I'm pretty sure Mom painted and fired that one at a ceramics class she took when I was younger. Weird). If I remember correctly, I think they buried the dog under the house. They lived on a hillside, so the house was all one floor, but the back had a deck with stairs. Underneath the house was a basement that Gramps used as a workspace -- he did some basic woodworking, if I recall, and the space had a dirt floor, so the dog was buried in a corner. I'm trying to recall his name -- Buddy, maybe? That sounds right, but I'm just not sure.

That's my (maternal) grandmother in the background. This is one of the VERY few photos I have of me with my mom's grandparents. I think Mom may have a couple tucked away in an album somewhere, but the fact remains that there are very few pictures of us together. That's indicative of the fact that, growing up, I spent very little time with my grandparents. Of course, we spent the holidays with them, and I can remember spending the night at their house a good bit, but that was actually time spent with my mom's little sisters (who are 6 and 9 years younger than Mom; Dee was 14 and Denise was 11 when I was born). Truth be told, I've never had much of a relationship with my grandparents. Of course, I love them; they are my family, and I have a fondness for them because of that. But there's just no relationship there with any depth or significance to it.  I don't remember them attending any of my dance recitals or my softball games or my FFA events; I don't remember spending one-on-one time with them, talking and learning and sharing and just being together. 

All of this has been weighing on my heart and mind recently. A couple of months ago, my grandmother was admitted to the hospital with congestive heart failure. She's battled cancer a number of times, most recently lung cancer, for which she underwent a lobectomy and then entered remission. For several days, things were really touch-and-go, and in the end we found out that her lung cancer had returned in the form of a large mass sitting over her heart that can't be treated with radiation, chemo, or other means. Basically, we were told it's just a matter of time.

What's hardest about this isn't the fact that I'm losing my grandmother; it's that I'm realizing that I never really had her to begin with. She was never a big part of my life while I was growing up, and so that pattern has continued into my adult years. I feel like I *should* take the time to go visit her now and take the girls to see her, but there's no emotional imperative behind that feeling. It feels like more of an expectation or an obligation -- like what I *ought* to do rather than what I *want* to do. And the awareness of these feelings -- well, that just makes it worse. I feel terrible that I don't feel worse about this, that there's an emotional void there; I keep thinking that I should be upset and then I'm bothered because I'm not. More than anything, I think there's still just a lot of confusion and regret about how absent they chose to be in my life when I was younger. And I'm not sure how to resolve that, or if it will ever be resolved.

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Wayback Wednesday is a new feature on the blog that replaces What's in my Heart Wednesday. Honestly, it's more like a melding of the two; however, What's in my Heart Wednesday made me just slightly uncomfortable. There are things that I choose not to share about my personal life here because they involve other people who read this blog or who know people who read this blog. Sharing that information crosses a line, so I chose to create a new feature, where I blog about an old photograph and the memories connected to it. I hope you'll join me in sharing your Wayback Wednesday posts.

10 on Tuesday: my 10 favorite entries

This summer, I took an Educational Technology class and one of the assignments was to reflect on our personal journeys with technology. After thinking about it, I realized that I've been blogging for ten years now. This current blog has been going since 2008 -- September 2008, to be exact, which prompted me to spend all evening yesterday reading through my archives. In the process, I came across a number of posts that I really like -- either because I feel like I've really shared a part of who I am, or because I feel like I've done a good job of sharing ideas and techniques. In the spirit of The Scrapper's Workshop and their "Looking Back..." posts, here are 10 of my favorite entries. 

1. Ten Years: I do a post commemorating my dad's death every year, but this one stands out to me more than the others because I really feel like it captures what I miss most about him. Plus, having these photos all in one place makes it really easy to come back and look at them whenever I want.

2. Scrapping the Right Now: a simple post with tips on how to scrapbook what's going on RIGHT NOW in your life

3. Blueprints: Conversations in Album Design: Liz and I completed a series of posts about album planning that I am really proud of. There's a lot of information and free organizational tools in those posts. The original article is here, with follow-up posts here.

4. Counting My Blessings: a post written in the aftermath of the huge ice storm we experienced in January 2009. This post is a very real reminder of all I have to be thankful for -- and I adore those pictures of Cami learning to knit. (She was so little; it's hard to believe that was just two years ago. She's grown SO MUCH since then.)

5. Choosing a Story to Tell: This is a post I wrote about the process I use to select which photos to scrapbook and how to partner those photos up with particular stories. There are some good tips in the comments as well.

6. Guest Bloggers: So this isn't one post -- rather, it's a series of posts. But these entries offer amazing inspiration in the form of words and photos. Seriously one of the best ideas I ever had. ;)

7. Last Night There Was a Ghost in my Car: This is the type of writing that I'd like to do more of on my blog. Another post about my dad, and music, and driving. 

8. Pairing Photos + Words: My favorite technique for putting stories and photos together. It works every time. And it's proof that journaling doesn't have to be complicated to be good.

9. R3wind: This is a free journaling course that I developed which combines my love of memorykeeping with my love of scrapbooking (and it's heavily inspired by one of my favorite bands as well). 

10. 10 on Tuesday: Early on, I started creating themed lists, rather than just random tens. As a result, I've gathered a great file of inspiration, links, eye candy, and more. Browse through the archives -- you'll see several posts about great photography tools, digiscrapping supplies, and home decor.